Best of Today's Inspirational Quotes -- compiled by Steve Moore

I used to sending my choice of two favorite "Today's Quotes" to friends. I've saved them all and the collection begins below.

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"Reality leaves a lot to the imagination." -- John Lennon

"Let us endeavor to live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry. " --- Mark Twain

"The largest living land mammal is the absent mind." --- Capt. Beefheart

"My mother drew a distinction between achievement and success. She said that achievement is the knowledge that you have studied and worked hard and done the best that is in you. Success is being praised by others. That is nice but not as important or satisfying. Always aim for achievement and forget about success --- Helen Hayes

"Keep a good heart. That's the most important thing in life. It's not how much money you make or what you can acquire. The art of it is to keep a good heart." --- Joni Mitchell

When one tugs at a single thing in Nature, he finds it hitched to the rest of the Universe." --- John Muir

"To unpathed waters, undreamed shores." --- W.Shakespeare (The Winter's Tale)

"How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sypathethic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and the strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of those." --- George Washington Carver

Hell, there are no rules here--we're trying to accomplish something --- Thomas Edison

"The mountain remains unmoved at seeming defeat by the mist." --- Rabindranath Tagore, (1861-1941) Bengali poet, novelist, composer. He won the 1913 Nobel Prize for literature

"How monotonous the sounds of the forest would be if the music came only from the Top Ten birds." --- Dan Bennett

"The best minds are not in government. If they were, business would hire them away." --- Ronald Reagan

"Everything you read in the newspaper is absolutely true except for the rare story of which you have first-hand knowledge." --- Erwin Knoll

"Anything played wrong twice in a row is the beginning of an arrangement." --- Frank Zappa

"The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient while nature cures the disease." --- Voltaire

"I would rather play 'Chiquita Banana' and have my swimming pool, than play Bach and starve." --- Xavier Cugat

"I thought Big Sur would be a great break after the tour. You'd walk down this rickety ladder to this not-very-pretty beach scene; crashing waves, moss-covered rocks, weird ocean life. It was scary. It summed up alot of things in my life, like 'I should be enjoying this, but I'm not." --- Trent Reznor, Nine Inch Nails

"Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the Ark. Professionals built the Titanic." --- submitted by friend of the list

"The least of things with a meaning is worth more in life than the greatest of things without it." --- Carl Jung

"I'd come home from school alone with those teenage blues and I'd put on Frank Sinatra's "It was a very good year." Here was this mature man singing about the cycle of his life, and as a kid I felt the emotions of it already. It has since been a touchstone for me whenever I want to experiment musically." --- Iggy Pop

"Have you ever noticed how people who wear camouflage gear really stand out in a crowd?" --- Peter Thomas, student

"Nothing will benefit human health and increase chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet." --- Albert Einstein

"My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people." --- Orson Welles

"I would like to be able to admire a person's opinions as I would their dog - without being expected to take it home with me." ---- Frank A. Clark

"Never play a thing the same way twice." --- Louis Armstrong

"If everything is under control, you are going too slow." ---- Mario Andretti

"Rudeness is the weak person's imitation of strength" --- Eric Hoffer NEW: Complete Hoffer Quotes

"Better to be a nobody and yet have a servant than pretend to be somebody and have no food." --- Proverbs 12:9

"Dietrich would never do that" --- Marlene Dietrich

"I wish a bag of money would fall on my head. Even if it hurt." --- Mary Fernwood

"In the coming years I would like to see politicians wear maintenance uniforms instead of business suits, because when they wear business suits they represent business. When they wear maintenance uniforms they are the servants that they are supposed to be." --- Danny Hoch

"In the year 2525, that song will be even less popular than when it first came out." --- Gary Shandling

"A human being is part of a whole, called by us the 'Universe' a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separated from the rest -- a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affection for a few persons nearest us. Our task must be to free outselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty." ---Albert Einstein

"The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts." --- Bertrand Russell

"When you are content to be simply yourself and don't compare or compete, everybody will respect you." --- Lao-Tzu

"Act in the valley so that you need not fear those who stand on the hill." --- Danish proverb

"Deal with the faults of others as gently as with your own." --- Chinese proverb

"A memorandum isn't written to inform the receiver, but to protect the writer." Dean Acheson

"Those are my principles. If you don't like them I have others." --- Groucho Marx(1890-1977)

"Death should not be seen as the end - but as a very effective way to cut down expenses." --- Woody Allen

"The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up."--- Jay Leno

"New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, - most of it unsolved." --- Johnny Carson

"You cannot put the same shoe on every foot." --- Publilus Syrus

"If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun." --- Katharine Hepburn

"What I really miss these days in music - is the music. I prefer to listen to melodies and songs, not just sounds." --- David Grohl (Foo Fighters, and former Nirvana drummer)

'These days, what isn't worth saying is sung." --- Pierre De Beauumarchais

BLAMESTORMING: Sitting around in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a project failed, and who was responsible

CHAINSAW CONSULTANT: An outside expert brought in to reduce the employee head count, leaving the top brass with clean hands. --- source: Dilbert's New Dictionary (submitted by Tim Bensch. Thanks Tim)

"The biggest mistake you can make is to always be right." --- Steve's Fortune Cookie, Bethesda Chinese Restaurant,1998

"Every library should be complete on something, if it were only the history of pinheads." --- Oliver Wendall Holmes

"To arrange a library is to practice- in a quiet and modest way - the art of criticism." --- Jorge Luis Borges

"Personally, I'm always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught." --- Winston Churchill 1874-1965

"Getting things done is not always what is most important. There is value in allowing others to learn, even if the task is not accomplished as quickly, efficiently or effectively." --- R. D. Clyde

"Sometimes it is more important to discover what one cannot do, than what one can do." --- Lin Yu-t'ang (1895-1976) Chinese writer

"Dad taught me everything I know. Unfortunately, he didn't teach me everything he knows." --- Al Unser, Jr., U.S. Auto Racer

"What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly." --- Richard Bach

"Is it a really good acid, or just a half-acid?" --- R. Friesen (Chemistry 124)

"The 21st century invention should be teleportation. And for the 20th century Time Capsule we should just include the entire Frank Zappa catalog." --- Jewell

"The computer will become the hub of a vast network of remote data stations and information banks feeding into the machine at a transmission rate of a billion or more bits of information a second. Laser channels will vastly increase both data capacity and the speeds with which it will be transmitted. Eventually, a global communications network handling voice, data and facsimile will instantly link man to machine--or machine to machine--by land, air, underwater, and space circuits. [The computer] will affect man's ways of thinking, his means of education, his relationship to his physical and social environment, and it will alter his ways of living... These forces] will coalesce into what unquestionably will become the greatest adventure of the human mind." --- David Sarnoff, President of RCA, **1964**

"I read a book twice as fast as anybody else. First, I read the beginning, and then I read the ending, and then I start in the middle and read toward whatever end I like best." --- Gracie Allen (1906-1964) US comedienne

"It's never too late -- never too late to start over, never too late to be happy." --- Jane Fonda

"If a dog will not come to you after he has looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience." --- Woodrow Wilson

"Dogs do not dislike poor families." --- Chinese Proverb

"No pressure, no diamonds." --- Mary Case

"The beginning is the most important part of the work. --- Plato (427-347 B. C.), The Republic

The quality of an organization can never exceed the quality of the minds that make it up --- Harold R. McAlindon

"Advice is like snow; the softer it falls the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper it sinks into the mind." --- Samuel T. Coleridge

"Concern for man and his fate must always form the chief interest of all technical endeavors.... Never forget this in the midst of your diagrams and equations." --- Albert Einstein

"Having served on various committees, I have drawn up a list of rules: Never arrive on time; this stamps you as a beginner. Don't say anything until the meeting is half over; this stamps you as wise. Be as vague as possible; this avoids irritating the others. When in doubt, suggest a subcommittee be appointed. Be the first to move for adjournment; this will make you popular; it's what everyone is waiting for." --- Harry Chapman

No man's knowledge here can go beyond his experience. --- John Locke

"The life you have led doesn't need to be the only life you have." --- Anna Quindlien

"Each friend represents a world in us, a world not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born." --- Anais Nin

"Am I not destroying my enemies when I make friends of them? --- Abraham Lincoln

"Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got." --- Janis Jopline

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